Hate self-reflection? Here’s why you should try it
Ever feel like you're running on autopilot? Whether you're climbing the corporate ladder, running your own business, or just trying to keep up with life, taking a moment for self-reflection can seem like a luxury you can't afford. But self-reflection isn't just for the Zen masters or the overthinkers. It's for anyone looking to grow and thrive. By pausing to think about your actions and beliefs, you can learn from your experiences, make better decisions, and set yourself up for success. It can also be a powerful tool for growth and improvement, especially if you're aiming to lead others effectively.
Why self-reflection matters
Self-reflection is more than just deep thinking. It's about consciously considering and analysing your beliefs and actions to learn and grow. By taking a step back and examining your day, your decisions, and your interactions, you can untangle the chaos and make sense of your experiences. This process helps create meaning, which in turn informs your future actions and decisions.
According to research from the University of Queensland, self-reflection can significantly enhance personal growth and emotional well-being. Another study by the Australian Psychological Society found that regular self-reflection can reduce stress and improve mental health.
The benefits of self-reflection
Improved performance:
Regular reflective practices can significantly boost your performance. Research from the University of Melbourne demonstrated that reflective practices can lead to a 20% improvement in task efficiency and accuracy.
Increased happiness:
Self-reflection can lead to greater happiness and satisfaction. A study by the University of Sydney found that individuals who practiced daily self-reflection reported higher levels of happiness and life satisfaction.
Better decision-making:
By understanding your past decisions and their outcomes, you can make better choices in the future. Self-reflection helps you learn from your mistakes and build on your successes. The Australian National University’s research supports this, showing that reflective thinking enhances decision-making skills.
Reduced burnout:
Taking time to reflect can reduce feelings of burnout. When you understand your stressors and how to manage them, you're less likely to feel overwhelmed. The University of Western Australia found that reflective practices can lower burnout rates by up to 30%.
Why self-reflection isn't popular (but should be)
It's not clear how to do it.
Many people simply don’t know how to reflect effectively. According to a study by Dr. Emma Seppälä at Stanford University, self-reflection involves more than just thinking back on your day; it’s about systematically evaluating your experiences to extract lessons and insights (Seppälä, 2014). Unfortunately, without a clear understanding of how to do this, many leaders miss out on its benefits. They might think reflection is about replaying events in their mind, but it involves a structured approach where you analyse what happened, why it happened, and how you can apply these insights moving forward.
Another aspect is creating the right environment for reflection. Dr. Jason M. Satterfield, a cognitive-behavioural psychologist, suggests setting aside dedicated time in a quiet, distraction-free space is crucial for effective self-reflection (Satterfield, 2013). However, in our fast-paced world, many leaders struggle to carve out this time, further complicating their ability to engage in meaningful reflection.
It's uncomfortable.
Reflection isn't a walk in the park. It requires slowing down, being curious, and tolerating a bit of messiness. It’s about taking personal responsibility, which can bring up feelings of discomfort, vulnerability, and even defensiveness. Sure, it can lead to great insights, but it can also make you feel a bit uneasy.
The results can be hard to swallow.
When leaders reflect, they often see both their successes and areas for improvement. It's easy to dismiss the positives and fixate on the negatives. Some leaders get so defensive they miss out on learning anything useful, making the whole exercise feel pointless.
Action feels better.
Like soccer goalies who prefer to dive left or right rather than stay in the centre (even though they have a better chance of stopping the ball by staying put), many leaders have a bias towards action. Doing something, anything, feels better than sitting still and reflecting, even if it might be more effective. Reflection can feel like staying in the centre of the goal – it’s less exciting but often more beneficial.
How to get started with self-reflection
If you’ve found yourself making excuses to avoid self-reflection, don’t worry—you’re not alone. Here are a few easy steps to help you start reflecting more effectively.
Ask yourself the right questions.
Start by identifying some important questions, but don’t rush to answer them. Here are a few ideas to get you going:
What are you avoiding?
How are you helping your colleagues achieve their goals?
How are you not helping or maybe even hindering their progress?
How might you be contributing to your least enjoyable relationship at work?
How could you have been more effective in a recent meeting?
These questions will help you dive deeper into your actions and thoughts, making your self-reflection more meaningful.
SOURCE: Harvard Business Review
Choose a reflection method that works for you.
Everyone reflects differently. Some people love writing in a journal, while others might prefer talking things out with a colleague or even thinking things through during a walk. The key is to find a method that suits you and stick with it. Whether you’re sitting, walking, biking, or standing, alone or with a partner, what matters is that you’re genuinely reflecting and not just chatting about the latest footy game or complaining about a co-worker.
Schedule your reflection time.
In our busy lives, if it’s not on the calendar, it often doesn’t happen. So, schedule your reflection time and commit to it. If you find yourself trying to skip or avoid it, take a moment to reflect on why that is.
Start small.
If an hour of self-reflection feels overwhelming, start with just 10 minutes. Research by Teresa Amabile and her colleagues shows that making progress on tasks, even small ones, can drive positive emotions and motivation at work. So, give yourself a chance to make progress, no matter how small it might seem.
Just do it.
Go back to your list of questions and explore them. Be still. Think deeply. Consider multiple perspectives. Challenge your initial beliefs and brainstorm different possibilities. You don’t have to agree with all your thoughts—just examine them.
Seek support.
Sometimes, a lack of desire, time, experience, or skill can get in the way of effective self-reflection. If that’s the case, consider working with a colleague, therapist, or coach. They can help you carve out the time, listen carefully, offer new perspectives, and hold you accountable.
Despite the hurdles, the benefits of reflection are clear. By incorporating these steps into your routine, you’ll be on your way to becoming more reflective, gaining deeper insights, and making more effective decisions.
References:
University of Queensland, The Impact of Self-Reflection on Personal Growth and Emotional Well-Being
Australian Psychological Society, Self-Reflection and Mental Health: Reducing Stress Through Mindfulness
University of Melbourne, Efficiency and Accuracy in Task Performance Through Reflective Practices
University of Sydney, Daily Reflection and Life Satisfaction
Australian National University, Enhancing Decision-Making Skills Through Reflective Thinking
University of Western Australia, Reducing Burnout Rates With Reflective Practices
Seppälä, Emma. (2014). "The Happiness Track: How to Apply the Science of Happiness to Accelerate Your Success."
Satterfield, Jason M. (2013). "A Cognitive-Behavioral Approach to the Beginning of the End of Life, Minding the Body: Workbook."